Role Of Women : Peaceful Abode

Allah says in the glorious Quran, “And Allah has made for you in your homes an abode of peace.” (Chapter 16 verse 80). IbnKatheer said here Allah is mentioning his complete blessing to his slaves; He has given them homes which are a peaceful abode for them to which they retreat as a heaven which covers them and gives them all kinds of benefits. 

The home makes a significant part of the human civilization, an abode of peace. But today most of the family members feel discomfort in homes and more relaxed outside. We often hear that it is woman who is responsible for creating discomfort in the families. However, it is not only woman who responsible for troublesome family life, but it is man who is more responsible than woman. Prophet SAW ordered man marry woman preferably on the basis of her religious character. But today it is beauty, status etc; but religious character does not bother us at all. It is obvious when we do against the sayings of Prophet SAW; we have to suffer our whole life. This saying of prophet has a deep wisdom behind it, first only true believing woman can give you comfort from all sides. She knows if she becomes ungrateful or unfaithful to her husband in any way, all her deeds,values turn nothing as is clearly mentioned in the sayings of prophet. And second, such type of woman handles criticalsituations common amongst spouses in a peaceful manner. She always remembers the accountability hereafter and never wants to waste her time in small and insignificant issues. 

Here we need to clear a big misconception. We may see couples apparently with Islamic background too finding it difficult to carry on and heading for divorce soon after marriage. Actually we need to understand fully how Islam guides us in all the situations beyond some prayers and other visible things.  Wearing hijab, offering five time prayer, and covering the body is desirous, but not enough to make you perfect. Religious character means one who makes Quran complete code of her life, who applies Quran in every aspect of life; if she has any big or small issue she finds solution in Quran.  This is religious spouse and this type of wife makes your life peaceful as Islam brings peace to its followers. 

Walls of a home have little to do with the building of healthy dynamics within family members. Making home a peaceful abode is very easy if all its members fulfill their responsibilities and that too especially woman and it will turn so if woman plays her natural role for which Allah has made her. Husband and children also play an important role in making home peaceful. The full maintenance and support of a wife is the entire responsibility of her husband.  He has to fulfill it to acquire peace. Children must be kind and obedient towards their parents. A wife is the whole peace giver. The only thing we women can do is changing ourselves tohandle everything in an efficient manner. Women are free from all other tedious burdens and this is a right given to us by Allah. We have specific task which Allah wants from us that is make home peaceful by following the guidance of Quran; upbringing children and remaining obedient and affectionate towards our husbands. 

Allah knows that it is only woman who can give aesthetic touch to life on earth that is why he gives us such responsibility. It is only woman who can add color to life. A home is a blessing when woman gives her role as home maker. But today’s demands changed her priorities and families lost the charm. As she spent more time outside, home suffers; and as she forgets her main role, it shakes the unity of the family and harms itsinfrastructure. That is why Allah says: “and abide quietly in your homes”. It means stay in your homes and do not come out except for a purpose-Ibn kathir. A woman should keep her home as the focus of her attention and activities and make it the base of her affairs. A woman who makes her keen focuses on her home and family members lives a more peaceful life than a woman who spends her most time outside.    

Peace is the first essential ingredient for a successful family life and children who grow up in a peaceful home grow with peaceful, productive and dynamic views. It is especially jobof a woman to make her home peaceful as only she has the control over this issue. What should a woman do to make home peaceful? First, worship Allah and accept Quran as a complete code of your life; fulfill the rights of your husband, children and your home according to the sayings of Prophet SAW. Never make such demands which husband can’t fulfill and show gratefulness for everything he does for you; always remain obedient to his commands under Islamic law; show affection towards husband and be kind to him; always support him wherever he needs your support; handle the issues with calm and cool approach. Add these qualities in your life; our homes will become the abode of peace Insha-Allah.

Home is also a place of protection from the filthy issues of the outside world. Prophet SAW said, the safety of a man in times of fitnah is in his staying home. But today we have more fitnah in our homes than outside. Allah says in the holy Quran, fitnah is worse than a murder. Today there is no member in the family who doesn’t take part in creating fitnah especially woman. She is involved in backbiting, slandering, calumnies, falsehood, lying, taunting, reviling and all these are cause of fitnah. These things spoil the relationship and create the hell out of peaceful abode. These create enmity between family members and at the end family loses its peace and charm. Here usually woman can play an important role in returning peace back by following teachings of Islam. Islam itself means peace, therefore it is only Islam which makes her peaceful and she in turn can makeeverything peaceful and charming. The woman that knows how to shower her family with attention and care will always emerge winner.

Last word: Islam opposes neither artistic creativity nor the enjoyment of beauty. In fact it is only Islam which makes life charming if obeyed completely. Following Islam does not mean detaching from all worldly affairs. It teaches us to enjoy the life of this world but according to the constitution of Quran.